The Crash, 2013

Sometime, late this morning, my computer froze while I was in the middle of a patient visit for someone with multiple medications for multiple issues.

Ugh.

So I logged out, restarted.

Tried to sign in.

Nothing, nothing and more nothing.

Deadness.

And I sat there stunned, almost unable to reboot my own brain to start using pen and paper again.

It was horrible, and made more horrible by the fact that most of the paper charts have been scanned and shredded.

Gone.

Having to rely solely on patients' memories for their drug allergies, medications is not fun, I work in the world of "I take a little white pill."  Really, really, could you be any less specific?.

And the process of identifying the problem would take at least two hours.

And all data from 12 midnight onward was lost.

Well, shoot.  Glad I didn't wake up after laying down with the kids to snuggle Wednesday night to finish those last two charts, they would have been done after midnight.

And I'm the lucky fool on call tonight, though fortunately it's been quiet - it just annoys me that four days after being on call for the entire weekend, I'm back on call.  Once upon a time, whoever worked the weekend got at least a week's reprieve from call.

So to symbolize my heartfelt dissatisfaction with Vitera, I made a voodoo doll, Vitera Man, and stuck four lovely pins into it.

Vitera Man,

 my 1st attempt at making a voodoo doll

 I think I may be on to something, a cottage industry of sorts. I would have rather worked on my quilt projects but I felt compelled, pulled drawn to quickly whipping this up.  The best part was sticking in the pins.

Right about the time I finished him, I got the email that the system was working again.

But I still cannot access Intergy from home, so I may have to go back to my pin cushion and grab a few more pins.

=========================================

Happy Birthday to my Dad.

He would have been 83 today.

Miss you.

Camping for the Non-Camper

Written sometime after the first weekend of May 2013.

As a prelude, I have served my time camping and earned my camper credentials:  one week each summer from 1969 through 1975 at Mar-Lu-Ridge, including one year when we camped out in the woods and dug our own pit latrine, one week of canoeing on the Shenandoah River, and one week of biking and camping along the C&O Canal, and weekend camping while I was a Girl Scout.  So basically, I have crossed camping off my bucket list.  Been there, done that: bitten by ticks and bugs, cooked over an open flame, slept on lumpy, rocky ground. I am over it.

Until my own daughter became a Girl Scout. . . . .

And as a Brownie bridging to Junior, went on her first overnight with her troop to Oak Springs with all of the mothers.  Indoor camping, which is not as posh as it seems.  Two inch foam mattresses covered in plastic on metal spring cot frames that creaked with every movement and guaranteed to make one feel twice one's chronological age, which is not bad when one is eight, but is hell when one is 50.  But mothers do things like this because we love our children and want them to have rich, full lives and a variety of experiences.

The first night at Oak Springs we cooked outdoors and had a campfire that night.  The next morning we used the house's kitchen to cook breakfast.  Flush toilets, running water, civilization.  A camping trip in the loosest sense of the word.

During this initial camping experience, we were hearing that next year we'll be outdoors and sleeping in platform tents.  Oh, joy.  Must we?

So here we are one year later and we're off to Camp Sacajewea.  Platform tents.  Latrines.  Obstacle courses.  Zip line. Hurray, hurray, my vertebrae and knees were just a-quiver with anticipation.

But we got a perfect Saturday, blue skies, warm sun.  It was a great day to be getting up at the crack of dawn to head out to WaWa to pick up lunch and head to the meeting place.

Our campsite at Camp Sacajewea was Smoke Rise, with six or seven platform tents, a little cabin with a refrigerator and a couple of picnic tables and right across the path from the latrine.  So far, not so bad.

After putting our gear in the tents, we went off to our first activity, the zip line.  Another Item I had crossed off my list - Steve and I went on a zip-line tour in Costa Rica.  Fortunately as the troop's designated photographer, I took the pictures.  Except my own kid, who was worried about becoming dizzy, so I was not pushing her.

After lunch we went to the obstacle course, but we arrived there early and the girls ran for the tire swings.  Luckily they were able to have a blast swinging before the obstacle course overlord arrived and shut the fun down by telling them that they had to be properly supervised.  We had three mothers and our troop leader.  I'm a nurse practitioner, and these kids have been on swings for years.  Seriously?  I was practically chewing the bark off of a tree so as not to explode.

The fun part of the obstacle course was seeing our troop of 4th graders beat a troop of 6th graders at a game where they all had to stand on a log, and then rearrange themselves by birth date or alphabetical order without their feet touching the ground in three minutes.  It was my Thea who came up with the idea of crawling on their knees, holding their feet up, to speed up the process.  The 6th graders were annoyed, but the obstacle course overlord deemed that no rule had been broken so Troop 71602 won.

Later that afternoon we went to the Lego Robotics activity and then we went back to our campsite for jewelry making and dinner preparation.

The troop was divided into two groups - one making dinner and one making breakfast.  For both meals, they did an amazing job, they worked together, did all the preparation without a lot of prodding or supervision, and both meals were great.  Chicken or veggie parmesan for dinner with bananas stuffed with marshmallows and chocolate chips for dessert., breakfast burritos for breakfast.  Campfire cooking has improved since the time I was in scouts.

For as gorgeous as the weather was during the day, it got a little chilly at night.  A lot chilly.  The kind of chilly that makes it hard to change into your pajamas.  Fortunately, in addition to our sleeping bags, I brought extra blankets for Thea and myself - either they could be used underneath the sleeping bags or on top.  Platform tents have slats that allow cold air to seep up through the floor, but Mrs. Church and her years of camping experience brought plastic tarps to put over the floor.  Layers of long sleeves, sweatshirts and sweatpants and wool socks and dreams of the electric mattress warmer on my half of the bed helped me survive the night. 

After breakfast, we packed up, went for a short walk to toss a stick or a rock into the pond and say what we liked best about the camping trip and we went home.

Bad, Bad Blogger

I have chosen quilting over blogging.

I have chosen reading over blogging.

I have chosen hanging out with my kids over blogging.

Add to the list movies/TV, sleeping.

And unfortunately I've chosen Facebook over blogging, though Facebook is a form of addictive, time-wasting micro-blogging.

The headlong rush at the end of the school year swallowed up free time.  The seemingly endless cascade of  the last Girl Scouts meetings, the last Cub Scouts meetings, the end of Mandarin school, the end of religious school (though I like that one best because it drops off the calendar first), the end of Tae Kwon Do class, field days as schools, end of year parties rolled through our lives and dumping us into summer.  Where camps, trips to the pool and other just everyday stuff took over, along with work, there is always work.

There are a few unfinished posts, started before extended hiatus from the blogosphere was in its early days.  They might eventually be posted. Or not.

Right now gearing up for school has started.  Physicals, eye exams, cleaning out closets and dressers.  Teacher assignments won't be posted until the 21st (for Micah) and the 22nd (for Thea).  I've read through the fifth grade supply lists and am hoping she is assigned the teaching team that uses spiral notebooks.  I am so over composition books.  I despised them when I was a fifth grader in Mrs. Isenock's 5th/6th combination class, and that sentiment has not faded four decades later.

Thea has commented on how quickly the summer has gone by - with as few viola practices, as little work on the summer Mandarin homework and as little recreation reading as she can manage.  I have not used time this summer honing my nagging skills.

So I'll either reform my non-blogging ways, or not. 

Long Weekend

Time to get little projects done like trying to get some of the dust bunnies lurking under the bed and in corners into the vacuum and some of the clutter out, creating a little nook with a new chair and my laptop on the leaf of my nightstand, getting right of bags of clothing that had been packed up a weekend (or two) ago and cleaning out the pantry to make room for my mother's china.

Time to work, no time to write.  I have become a very lazy blogger, with drafts of posts piling up on my blog post list.  Spring is busy and exhausting, too many activities and too much pollen.  (Written in April 2013.)

We have a new family member, a yellow-bellied slider turtle adopted through the Mid-Atlantic Turtle and Tortoise Society.  Believe it or not, reptiles are abandoned by their owners, it's not just cats and dogs (and guinea pigs).  The lady who fostered Charlie for a week after picking him up from Baltimore where he'd lived for a year after being rescued told me of a turtle she had just taken to a new home whose aquarium had been put out in the trash with the turtle still in it.  Charlie and his new aquarium resides in Micah's room, and Micah is thrilled.

Getting the aquarium, getting it set up, getting the pump assembled getting the very large, very heavy coffee table out of the garage and upsairs, and all the other stuff was a series of misadventures.  The pump had missing tubing and had to be returned.  Steve actually read the back of the label of the aquarium and found it was not to be filled with water. Huh?  I made mention of the fact that the tank was going to be used for an aquatic turtle when I was buying the supplies at Petsmart - and the salesperson working with me has turtles as pets.  Turtles need UVA and UVB lights to keep their shells strong, and the lights remain on for twelve hours per day.  The day I had arranged to drive to Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania to pick him up, it snowed all morning making the Turnpike 80 miles of slushy torture.  I didn't want to open the box with Charlie until I picked up Micah, so we got him home, opened the box and what was described as a six-inch turtle was was more like nine or ten inches, depending on how the shell is measured.  And we only had a few minutes to put him in his tank and keep on moving to Micah's appointment with Dr. Choe.

So the larger than anticipated turtle needed a bigger basking shelf - another trip to Petsmart, and the lady from MATTS said he would have some of his familiar tank plants with him.  Didn't happen.  Cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching.  I hope the bulk of the upfront costs are finished.

Meanwhile on Monday I bought some guppies for Charlie.  Fast food, food that is highly motivated to be fast, they swim as if their lives depend on it.  When the five went into Charlie's tank, he shot off his basking shelf and got himself one, and then another.   And I thought one more went into his stomach, but it was doing a better job hiding than the other two who have banded together for survival.  After I put in the feeding stone for the surviving guppies, Charlie decided to hover over it waiting for them. . . .

Micah loves him, he doesn't shed and he's quiet.

ChongQing 2004 Reunion

Thea and Jennifer

It's been almost nine years since a small band of  adoptive parents boarded planes that took them to San Francisco where they boarded an Air China flight to Beijing.  Some of the group knew others from the travel workshop given by the adoption agency, but since everyone was scattered throughout the jumbo jet,  once everyone made it off the plane and into passport control at the airport, the group began to form for the first time.  At baggage claim, we met our guides and the adventure of getting to know one another began.

We went on a jetlag-fueled blitzkrieg tour of Beijing: Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City, lunch at a Friendship Store a visit to the Great Wall at Baodaling and as darkness fell, a trip back to the Beijing airport and a flight to ChongQing.

And on what was Labor Day back in the States, we gathered in the dining room of the Holiday Inn to fill out paperwork with our guides.

What made us a group came later that afternoon.  We boarded a large tour bus and went to an office building on the other side of ChongQing.  Rather nondescript, an elevator capable of holding at most four or five people and a ride up to the office where we met our kids. Thirteen babies from three different social welfare institutions, they were the glue that made us a group.

Trips to the grocery store to buy formula and baby food, pacing the hallways, hanging out in the playroom at the hotel, sight-seeing trips to the ChongQing Zoo, sharing stacking cups, toys, Tylenol for infants, the plane to GuangZhou, shopping and bargaining made us a very large, slightly strange family.  Two weeks together until we boarded a plane that took us to Shanghai and from there to San Francisco, and at SFO, we scattered - to New Jersey, Pennsylvania, New York, Ohio, Minnesota, Colorado.

We are fortunate to be in New Jersey, which puts us in an area were a large number of our travel group live, and we have been doubly fortunate that we've stayed in touch - and that we get together every year.  The group changes a bit every year - especially since the kids are getting older and have activities and social lives of their own.  But the gathering happens - and the shared experiences of having people ask if our children are 'really' siblings (with 'really' being a synonym for 'biological'), what about their 'real' mothers, how much did you pay for them. All the annoying questions that you can share the answers that you would have liked to have given if we did not feel compelled to be the polite ambassadors for international adoptions.  And a thousand other topics, shared memories and whatnot.  Yesterday was that day, and it was wonderful - and I say this even after having to work in the morning and being on call for the weekend.

Meanwhile, our kids have grown, siblings have been added to the families and even though they don't see each other, they all seem to know that their shared history is important - and most of them have iPods, Nintendos, Wiis; the universal language of the electronic childhood becomes their common thread just as the shared experience of the trip to China binds the adults - and hanging out with other kids is more entertaining than hanging out with a bunch of parents.  The kids do pop over to the parents table every now and then, to check in, to eat and for that they will receive the pat on the head, the "look at how much you've grown" from the friends of their parents, so far they are not rolling their eyes at this, but that day may come.

Jennifer, Micah, Thea and Juliana

Next year will be the 10th anniversary of that trip that made us a group, and we've started talking about how to celebrate, could we get those members who don't live as close to come?, where to have it?  Our kids will be 10 to 11 or so, with younger and older siblings.  Suggestions welcome.

China 2004 kids, plus siblings, plus high school exchange students

Persuasion

 Micah and Gracie, January 17, 2013

Micah's first grade class is learning how to write a persuasive letter:  This is what we received via the US mail from him; we are expected to respond in kind, mailing the letter to him at school.


02/05/2013

Dear Mom and Dad,

I love both of you.  You are both the generous Mom and Dad I ever had in my life.  I would like a dog or a trddlr (turtle) please.  Having a dog or a trddlr is important to me because wen I get home I don't  get any atation (attention).  Once time we went on a family walke.  I saw one of our nabrze (neighbors) was walkeing there dog.  I got jaulous (jealous).  I will do chorz (chores) for you and maybe you can pay me.  I will help you pay for the dog.

For example one time I was riding in Bill's and Donna's car and I was in the back with Grase (Gracie).  I dasided (decided) I would persuasive both of you.  Another ressin (reason) is one time I was at Tesh's house and I was rubbing her dog's toume (tummy), it was fun.

Love, Micah

Lydia M. Grebe, CEO

Mom, Inc.

Plainsboro, New Jersey

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Micah Albin

c/o Mrs. M. Collins, Room #15

Wicoff School

Plainsboro, NJ 08536

Dear Micah:

Thank you for your lovely letter.  Your handwriting was an example of your neatest work, clearly your request for a dog or a turtle is very important to you.

Unfortunately, we here at Mom, Inc. must respectfully decline your request for a dog.  For the purposes of convincing you of my point, let me provide you with a number of facts influencing the decision to say "NO!" to a new, canine member of our family:

1.) We have two guinea pigs, Darwin and Galileo.  Remember them?  I don't think so since both you and your sister, who both found these messy little creatures so enchanting two years ago, barely give them the time of day now.  If your father did not spend the time needed to care for them and clean their cage, I would have given them to the nice Ecuadorian home health aide who took care of Oma who said they were a delicacy in her country.  And I probably would have also included a couple of skewers and a complimentary bottle of barbecue sauce to seal the deal.

2.)  A dog is an enormous responsibility, both financial and time-wise.  Your $2.00 per week allowance will not adequately cover the financial responsibilities of dog ownership, which included food, chew toys, veterinarian costs, pet sitters and other incidentals.  I know you are expecting great things from the $0.50 weekly cost-of-living increase you will receive on March 2 when you turn seven, but it still will not come close to the hundreds of dollars needed to take good care of a dog.  And while your intentions of promising to do chores to help earn money are well-intended, your track record for doing the same chore, week after week, still needs some additional practice.

Additionally, a dog is a large commitment of time, which is in short supply around our house.  How would you feel about being sent out into the backyard to scoop up dog poop on a weekly basis?  Would you be able to remember to put out fresh water morning and evening for the dog?  Doubtful.  You don't drink enough fluids yourself.  Would you vacuum every other day to keep dog hair from piling up on the floors?  Would you be able to train to the dog to stay off of the furniture?  Train the dog to not pee or poop on the rugs and floors?  And what would you do if the dog you want so badly chewed up your enormous collection of stuffed animals and other toys?  What would this dog do all day while we are at work and you are at school?  It really is not fair to the dog to be cooped up in the house all day with no attention.  Dogs are social animals and when they become bored and lonely, they can be destructive.

When we do get home from work, I am not going to be stuck walking the dog after you have become bored with caring for it or would rather play Wii or it is too cold or wet or rainy to take the dog on a walk.  Or if you must complete your homework assignments or after you start participating in other extra-curricular activities, I am not going to be the safety net.  If I am going to use up the remaining cartilage in my knees, I am going to use it seeing Venice, Stockholm, Prague, Budapest or Hong Kong and not walking around our neighborhood at the end of leash, picking up dog poop in a plastic bag so that we do not run afoul of the neighborhood association.

3.) I would also like to refute your argument that your father and I pay no attention to you, and would like to put forth a claim that you chose to spend time on many activities other than lavishing love, affection and attention upon your parents and sister.  We spend a good deal of time arranging play dates with your friends, chauffeuring you to various activities such as soccer, ice skating, Cub Scouts, etc. and time hanging out with you.  You, on the other hand, are often more engaged in playing with your friends at EDP and ignore the parent who has come to pick you up and seem annoyed that we have arrived.  Mom, Inc. is considering implementing a new plan of periodic electronics-free weekends.  Stay tuned for news on this.

4.) A few stylistic comments on your letter:  Don't lay the praise on so thick.  We're your Mom and Dad, we are neither the BEST mom and dad in the world, nor the WORST.  There are lots and lots and lots of excellent mothers and fathers in this world.  Lots.  I love you to pieces and your smile and humor light up my world on a daily basis, but just about every Mommy thinks that her kids are the best in the world and we all cannot be right.

5.) Another minor comment on the form of address on your letter's envelope:  how nice of you to address it to Daddy and Grandma or Aunt Ginny.  You know my name and you know it is NOT Mrs. Albin.  Attention to minor details like this can be almost as persuasive as the contents of the letter itself.  It is very important not to irritate your audience before she even opens the envelope.

Again, you are one of the lights of my life and I love you very, very much, but as much as I love you, your request for a dog is declined (which translates to "Mommy says 'No way!'" in your world.)

I am, however, open to the concept of a turtle.  Submit your proposal showing me that you understand what a turtle needs in terms of a habitat and food to the address listed above, my people will call your people and we'll do lunch to hash out the details.  Maybe it could even happen in time for your birthday, may be not considering that we will need to see how long it takes the Mid-Atlantic Turtle and Tortoise Society review our application and how long it takes the State of New Jersey to issue a permit to own a turtle.  Neither of these things are under my control.  Start saving your allowance for that 55 gallon tank, though.  To paraphrase Louis Pasteur, "Chance favors the prepared (mind)."

Hugs, kisses and love you bunches,

Mommy